Epistles.

I'm begging you.
Please take me back to that grade school shit.
The days where you need a messenger to send a love letter.
The days where holding hands would suffice.
The days where first kisses were the biggest thing.


I'm begging you.
Please make me feel like a little girl again.
The days where you get butterflies because of a simple myspace comment.
Where a simple text would make a day extra special.
The days where talking on the phone never had an end: falling asleep and waking up STILL on the phone and saying goodmorning.

I'm begging you.
Please take me higher.
Out of sin.
Out of the depths of lies, deception, games.
Out of doubt, uncertainty, insecurities.


Please, make me want to be better than i am.



Have you ever felt like you're constantly letting it slip?
"I'm so aware, yet so detached."
Have you ever felt like you know what you want, but doubt it'd never happen?
Have you ever felt like you can't go back but wish you could just to feel like you're still intact?
Have you ever felt so frustrated because you can't match up?
Have you ever felt tired because you're the only one that cares so much?
Have you ever felt so careless because someone totally just let you walk out of their lives without a fight?



A girl like me
who has everything and more @ her feet
and who has no reason to complain or feel sad or mad or anything with a negative connotation still does.
I've lost more than i've bargained for.
i've lost more than the other.



Isn't is funny how you can have everything @ your feet
and still feel like you have nothing at all?